sigh...when will i learn?

There are some days when I feel like I belong with the Israelites, wandering around in the desert. God brought them out of Egypt, through the Red Sea and was going to give them the Promised Land. But they forgot. And they grumbled. And they complained. They worried that God wasn't going to take care of them, even though he has just parted a freakin sea for them. And food that falls out of the sky every morning? Apparently it didn't have enough sage and parsley in it for their taste.

So that's been me this last week.

I worried and fretted about money. We've been really really tight with the new jobs, unemployment, etc. We have income and property taxes due soon. My recent visit to the ER wasn't cheap. And then last Friday the truck broke down. I wanted to scream. I was really mad. And I've been kinda mad ever since. Stewing. It was going to cost us several hundred. But how in the world? How were we going to get this fixed? I just couldn't imagine that God would provide the money for this. WHERE WAS MY FAITH?? Has he not provided for us, for our every need? Today I was reading "Balance That Works When Life Doesn't" by Susie Larson. (Excellent excellent book). One question in the study guide was "What one thing is weighing on you right now?" Money. The next step was to find a verse in the Bible that addressed that burden. Immediately I thought of Phil 4:19, my God will supply all of your needs according to his riches in Christ Jesus. The next step was to seek forgiveness for not trusting God with that burden. So I did.

Today, like many of the last week, Skip had to pick me up at work. When I stepped out of the building my jaw dropped. He was driving the truck. What the heck?? It wasn't the costly transfer case (whatever that is) that needed to be replaced. It was a little 10 cent fuse for the 4-wheel drive. God totally provided for our need. In a big way. And here I worried that he wouldn't. When am I going to learn?

Thanks, God, for helping me see you a little more today. I love you!

a most unusual easter day

Usually people spend Easter with family. It's a lot like Thanksgiving. Ours was a little out of the ordinary. I had invited a coworker over and was prepared to have a guest all day. Got the big case of beer and the bottle of wine, planned a new pork loin recipe and expected the day to be filled with watching sports and just hanging out. My coworker didn't end up coming over. Skip got home early from church (it was an incredible service btw) and we had a leisurely lunch. The kids went to their rooms for quiet time/nap time and Skip and I had a few hours to ourselves. We played an exciting game of Trivial Pursuit (who knew the Archimedes Screw was used in water?) and prepared the house for the traditional "Bunny Trail/Egg Hunt". The kids came out of their rooms and enjoyed looking all over the house for the jelly bean-filled eggs. I got dinner going and it wasn't going really how I expected. I didn't give the pork loin enough time to cook and all the other things were close to being done. So I cut it up into pork chops and shoved it back in the oven. Meanwhile the kids were playing remarkably well together. So when dinner was ready Skip and I sat down and called the kids to the table. Ella said she wasn't hungry yet (it was 6pm). So I looked at Skip and said, "Let's just enjoy this dinner together with our bottle of wine and let them eat later." So we did. It was delightful. I thoroughly enjoyed my Riesling, pork loin that was so tender I didn't need a knife, asparagus and crispy potatoes while the kids played in the background. I didn't have to tell kids to eat time and time again. I didn't have to cut someone else's food up. I got to have a dinner date with my hubby at no extra cost! I loved it. And the food was absolutely delicious. So was the wine.

Skip just told me something that I didn't know. I had no idea that Easter was one of his favorite holidays. "Why?" I asked him. He mouthed, "Candy!" to me. I laughed out loud. He's a Peep, Cadbury Cream Egg, jelly bean, malted milk ball, etc. fanatic. He said, "Easter is Halloween for Christians." I laughed out loud again. Unbelievable. Un-stinking-believable. I love that my husband has a great sense of humor.

So today at church I did a drama. I did a monologue of a woman who had recently had a miscarriage and was struggling with the pain and feeling like God was a million miles away. It was really powerful. The tears were real. I had a miscarriage in my first pregnancy almost 7 years ago. It was an extremely painful experience. The one thing I learned during that time was what peace felt like. God ministered to me deeply by overcoming me with wave after wave of his inexplicable peace. I'm thankful for that experience because it has allowed me to connect with many women (many of them friends) in a way that I wouldn't have otherwise.

So what did you do this Easter? Will you at least respond to this: "He is Risen!"

Simon says

I'm getting Simon dressed this morning. He has his shirt off and points to his nipples.
Simon: Mom, what are these?
Me: They're nipples.
Simon: (with a diabolical laugh) Daddy has reeeeeeeally big ones.


Ella is always singing. Always. And she sports a pretty pronounced vibrato. She was singing some song in the car yesterday. It was kinda loud. Simon says in a very frustrated tone with his hands over his ears, "Ella, your singing is dreadful." Wow. He must think we named him after Simon Cowell. (which we didn't...no really...we didn't). And where did he learn that word? Oh wait. Skip watches American Idol with the kids. He probably picked it up from Cowell. Sheesh.


We were at the grocery store the other day. We wandered into the produce area and Simon saw the asparagus. "MOM! Will you please get me some asparagus? I love asparagus! No wait! I want sugar snap peas. Mom, can you get me some sugar snap peas?" Um, who are you? Where is my son? You know, the one that calls every kind of meat on his plate chicken and reminds us that he doesn't like chicken, regardless of what kind of chicken it is, except if it's the hot dog kind of chicken.

And yes, I bought the boy some asparagus AND sugar snap peas.

queen of something

My dog has it good. Like WAY good. She's the kind that will lay her head on the pillow when she sleeps. What a lazy thing.

one laptop per child...i don't get it

Am I the only one that thinks the organization "One Laptop Per Child" is ridiculous? Their mission to help children in underdeveloped countries to learn. Learn what? To become online game addicts? How to reconnect with friends on myspace that moved from their village? "Learning learning" is their catch phrase. It's to teach the kids to learn how to learn.

Ok so let's work this out. You give an 8 year old a laptop. Sure, it's well made, durable, etc. Unless every kid in that village has one, our little 8 year old will have to protect his treasure like it were his own life. He would constantly be in fear that the 12 year old would want it. Or the 25 year old who terrorizes the village. And how long will a laptop last in the Sahara Desert? Although they can be found everywhere here in the US, I doubt they have Geek Squad on the corner of Sandy Street and Dusty Boulevard. And how will learning on a laptop (one that will probably last him, say, 2 years MAX) help him beat poverty, malnutrition, persecution?

I will give the creators of this concept respect. They have come up with a one-of-a-kind idea. But how practical is it? I guess I'm more about meeting the basic needs of kids first, which is why we support Mosley Ndeva in Kenya with Compassion International. We've been supporting Mosley for at least 7 years now. Our money goes directly to him to provide for his education, to celebrate Christmas and birthdays, to help him survive and thrive. Not only that, but it also has introduced him to Jesus. And that is worth more than a thousand green laptops.

no carnies at this carnival

Today was Ella's big school carnival. It was pretty packed with people. The kids had an absolute blast. I, on the other hand, did not. I volunteered to help with refreshments. How hard could that be? Well, let me tell ya. I figured I'd be standing at a table with lemonade and gross, store-bought cookies. No they were selling pizza, hot dogs, nachos, chips, etc. So I was up to my pits in greasy, cold pizza and stinky hot dogs. There was little organization so it pretty much utter chaos. I wish I hadn't volunteered and just enjoyed the time with the fam. Lesson learned.

Click here to see a pic of my pirate and kitty cat.

note to self

Next time you have a large glass of wine at 9:30pm, don't do laundry. You get confused about which clothes go into which basket. You stumble over the clothes piles. It's not a good idea.

It's happening

I knew it would come but not this soon. I thought I had at least another year or two.


Boys. Boys that like my daughter.


Ella brought home her first love note the other day from a boy named Devan. I can't remember exactly which boy is Devan but Ella assures me that it's not the one who always gets in trouble. :-) We found the note in her backpack and asked her what it meant. She said that it meant that she loved her friends.







"Friends." That's my girl. Let's just keep it at "friends" for awhile now. We encouraged her in loving her friends.